With a lot of the Japanese girls you’re likely to meet, one of the most difficult barriers is the language barrier. Of all the different types of Asian women you’ll come across, Japanese girls often have the most difficult time pronouncing English words. So, learning some basic phrases is always a good idea.
Japanese girls find it very “cute” when a foreigner attempts to speak to them in their own language. If your pronunciation is terrible, that’s okay—they appreciate the effort.
Good morning: O hay ou
Good afternoon: Ko ni chi wa
Good evening: Kon ban wa
I’m John: John de-su
Excuse me, where is Hibiya ave? Sumimasen, hibiya dori wa doko desuka (dori=ave, so you can substitute whatever location you want in there)
Do you want to eat something: Nanika tab-e masuka?
Do you want to drink: Nomi masuka?
How old are you: Nansai?
Are you a student: Gakusei desuka?
You’re really pretty (a solid opening line!): Kimi te honto ni kirei dane
You have a nice personality: Anata no seikaku suki yo
You’re interesting: Anata wa mirou kuteki ne
I like your hair: Anata no heasutairu ga suki
Are you in a relationship? Tsukiatteru hito iru?
You must have many boyfriends: Kanojo ippai irun deshou
Would you like to go on a date? Atashi to dekakenai
I’ll see you later today: To de mata ne
I’m glad we met: Aete yokatta
Sexy: Seku shii na
Suitaru ga ii na: You have a nice figure (another opening line that will get you nowhere with Western women, but will flatter Asian girls)
Boko no me o mite: Look into my eyes (A great line to use during an intimate conversation with a Japanese girl. The effect on her can be mesmerizing! Then, compliment her on how beautiful her eyes are…)
I love you so much I could die: Shinu-hodo aishiteru
You are the only one I want: Boku-ga hoshii-nowa kimi-dake
I want to make love to you: Kimi-to netai
Let’s go to the love hotel: Lub hoteru eek u zo
Let’s do it now: Ima shiyo
That feels good: Kimocho
You’re really pretty: Kimi-te honto-ni kirei-dane
Don’t I know you from somewhere: Mae-ni atta-koto aru?
When do you want to get married (great flirting line): Itsu kekkon-shitai?
If you’re spending time in the major cities of Asia, you’re bound to encounter “spoiled brats”: girls with a “gimme gimme” attitude. In recent times, Japanese girls have become quite notorious for this.
“Brats” are obsessed with owning the latest designer handbags, shoes, the hottest new cell phone, etc. They expect their boyfriends to spoil them rotten, yet show little appreciation. (In fact, they seem to usually be pouting about something.)
It seems like a lot of deep-pocketed Asian guys accept this as the price of dating a hot young babe (or keeping a mistress). In fact, it gives them status and “face” (honor) among their peers if they can afford to buy a woman whatever she wants.
Friends of mine who’ve lived in Japan for many years say that there are more “spoiled brats” over there than ever before. This mentality dates back to the 1980s, when Japan ascended as a global economic power. Japanese people enjoyed new levels of wealth and prosperity that would have been impossible a generation ago. The men were secure in lifetime corporate jobs, and the wives no longer needed to work. The kids didn’t need to help pay for their college education. The parents covered everything.
At the same time, luxury brands from overseas became very popular. Japanese people who now had money wanted to show it off, and they did so by becoming huge consumers of designer brands.
You’ll find plenty of “brats” in any Asian culture. For example, although the Philippines is a poor country, a ton of wealth is concentrated among a small percentage of the population. Filipinas from wealthy families, and those who hang out in the elite social circles in Manila, can be just as materialistic as any brat in Hong Kong or Tokyo.
But before you dismiss these women as shallow gold-diggers, you need to understand how it works in their culture. An Asian guy who is financially well-off wants to shower women with money and gifts, because this is how he proves his status (to her, and to his peers) as well as his level of commitment.
Wealthy Asian dudes could care less about whether girls are “gold diggers.” They expect the most desirable women to want Louis Vuitton bags, Rolex watches, and even new cars and condos—and as long as they’ve got the money, they’ll supply it for them.
In a sense, “love” and “money” become one in the same. Asian guys show their love by spending money and supporting women financially, and the women see this as an expression of love. The more he spends on her, the more he must care about her. If a guy has money, but won’t spend it on her, then she won’t think he is serious about her.
Western guys, on the other hand, view “love” and “money” as separate concepts. We want to find women who love us for “who we are.” When a woman we’ve only known for a short time asks us to spend money on them, we worry that she only cares about our wallet. We may become more generous with a woman once we know she really cares about is, but it’s not in our nature to offer to cover a girl’s rent, car payments and credit card bills before we even sleep with her!
Well, you’d be shocked at how fast Asian guys will put a hot girl on a “monthly support plan.” (See the upcoming section on Chinese women for more details.)
The amount of money you’ll need to spend to maintain a girlfriend in Asia is all relative. Girls who travel in high-end social circles want the Rolex and the Loius Vuitton. Simple girls will appreciate a small stipend each month to support themselves and help their families.
The bottom line is, in Asia, if she feels you’re being “cheap” with her, she probably isn’t going to take the relationship very seriously because the concepts of love and money are intertwined. And really, if you consider how much money it costs to maintain a girlfriend (or wife) in the Western world, we’re talking about very small amounts if your girlfriend in Asia comes from a humble background. These are people that consider $500 a month to be a fortune.
Also be aware that a lot of Asian girls who date foreigners are always “comparing notes” with each other about what kinds of gifts and financial support they’re receiving. If your girlfriend lives in an area where there aren’t many foreigners, then this won’t be an issue; she hasn’t been exposed to these concepts. But if she hangs out with girls who have foreign boyfriends, and they’re living a better lifestyle than the one you are providing your girl with, they might start filling your girl’s mind with all kinds of ideas about how she could be “doing better.”
If she has friends who are receiving far more from their foreign boyfriends, she may be on the lookout for a B.B.D. (Bigger Better Deal).
This is not to say that you necessarily need to support an Asian woman at all. It all depends on the circumstances. A simple girl who comes from a province, who has had limited contact (if any) with foreigners, is probably just looking to fall in love with a nice guy. But if your girlfriend lives and works in an area with a large population of foreigners and expats (and especially if she works in the bars and clubs) then she knows the deal. She’s more hip to the “game” than you can imagine. She knows girls who are being spoiled rotten by foreigners. She has also been conditioned by her friends to believe that foreigners are mainly a bunch of liars and “butterflies” (playboys), who are quick to say “I love you” but seldom back it up.
(Asian guys don’t say “I love you.” They show it by taking care of a woman financially. Foreigner guys, in the view of the women, are the opposite: they’re quick to say “I love you,” but they’re usually reluctant to commit to one woman and support her financially.)
Unfortunately, Asian women who are uneducated and come from poor backgrounds don’t understand that we foreigners come from all sorts of different financial circumstances. In their eyes, whether you’re a bus driver or a millionaire back home, if you’ve got white skin then they will assume that you’re very well-off. Therefore, if you want to pursue a serious relationship with one of these girls, they will not be faithful to you if they feel that you are being cheap.
Sure, they may stay faithful to you for a while—but unless you’re living in Asia full-time, the expression “out of sight, out of mind” becomes all too true. If your girlfriend is a sexy young chick, another foreigner who offers her the Bigger Better Deal could be just around the corner—and it won’t be in her nature to turn it down.